Lonely Girl
by YoungGrasshopper2
Summary: Donna gets stuck in a pool of drugs, lies, and pain...[Rated R for drug content, and language] *ch.3 added* HEY KiDS, I UPDATED! Lol.
1. Chapter 1

*Okay, I really don't need to start a new story, but I am. lol. I don't know if i'm interpreting this song right or not, but I like it, and think I am. lol. E/D. Donna's POV. Okay, so review me, kay? 3, *ChELL*  
  
Disclaimer- I do not own Donna, Eric or any other characters from that 70's show (but damn that'd be awesome. lol) I also do not own the song "Lonley Girl". It belongs to the very talented artist known as Pink. :)  
  
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:.chapter 1.:  
  
Oh God. Oh God. I don't know why I have these thoughts. I'm just normal, right? I'm a normal person. I've never really had thoughts like this.  
  
I've had a good life, nothing too traumatic's happened. I mean, the stuff with my mom of course, but it wasn't anything serious. It's not like she was dying. Ya know?  
  
I push the pill to the back of my throat, get a bottle of water, and take it down. Taking more, one after the other, until I'd took almost seven. Intentionally, of course. I'm doing this, everytime I do this, I take one more, gradually killing myself.  
  
It's not that I want to kill myself. I just want to hurt myself, shake things up a little, just get attention, really. I'm being selfish. Selfish Donna.  
  
But maybe I do want to kill myself. Something that's sparked inside me, tearing me up, wearing my insides away or something. Some thoughts that are like flies to garbage, that's inside me, using my insides as the garbage.  
  
I put the water down, and as soon as I can wipe the condensation from my hands, I get a dizzy spell..a strong pounding above my eyes. Those pills. Those damn pills.  
  
It brings me to my knees, as I kneel on the floor. I put my hand on my forehead, clinching it, and massaging it trying to ease it.  
  
This is what you wanted, Donna. You wanted to hurt yourself! I told myself, sighing with the pain.  
  
I stand up. Oh screw it. And I sit on the edge of my bed. A cold sweat forms on my forehead, and I roll my eyes.  
  
After a couple of minutes sitting there, by myself (As always) I hear a knock on my bedroom door.  
  
"Yeah?" I yell, cooly not even acting like I'm up to anything, just being my normal self. I threw the pills under my bed quickly, as they rattled in the bottle, spilling out all over the floor. "Shit." I mumbled under my breath.  
  
"It's me!" I recognized the cheerful voice. Eric. He opened the door, and came over to my bed, sat next to me, and kissed me on the forehead. "Oh my God, I had the best day." He said, doing his little stare thing, where he just looks out into his own little world. He started talking. About something. Just his little mindless great life. Five minutes seemed to pass, just him talking. I was hearing him, then he was going out of range, he just sounded, and looked blurry to me...  
  
"Don't that just rock though? I mean who knew!?" Eric said, enthusiastically.  
  
"Yeah. Yay!" I said, acting all happy. How I was at one time. How I remembered myself, in the past. How I wished I could be again--happy. I remembered when Eric's little random stories would intrigue me. I would love it. I would love him. I guess I do love him, but I feel no love in my heart. It's cold, like stone.  
  
I winced, slightly. Feeling another sharp ass pain in my head. My heart was racing, and the icy sweat still drenched my forehead.  
  
"Donna? You ok, baby?" Eric asked, looking confused.  
  
"Yeah.." I say, but I feel a tightening in my chest all of the sudden, finding it hard to breathe. Breaking into a coughing fit, it burning me. But I didn't care.  
  
"Donna?" I look at him, looking at me concerningly. Wondering what he was thinking.  
  
A tear streaked down my face.  
  
"Do I need to call an ambulance or something?"  
  
"No..Er-" The words wouldn't come out. "I'm fin-" Coughing again.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm FINE!!!" I snap, burying my head underneth a pillow nearby. Eric moved closer to me, obviously concerned, as I hit him off.  
  
Then that's when he saw it. He found the trail of pills leading out from under my bed, that had spilled earlier.  
  
"Donna, what's this?" He said, digging out the bottle. "Aspirin? Donna what are you doing?"  
  
Aspirin wasn't all I've been taking. I've took everything. I've took things I've found, I've took prescription pills I've bummed off of the pharmacist at the local pharmacy. He'd always been one of my friends. Told me they were 'happy pills' and I believed him, so I've took those also. Don't know what they were, and I know he'd get fired if they knew he gave me those, but I didn't give a damn. He's always been a little shit head, anyway. In a good way of course, thank you.  
  
"I had a migrane, and I took one. They spilled out, it's nothing Eric...Since when'd you get so paranoid?"  
  
He sighed, thinking about it. "Oh." He said, obliviously. "Well, I'll go if you want me to."  
  
"Okay." I said, a blank expression on my face. "I'm sorry..."  
  
"Don't worry about it." He kissed me again, as I stood, and fell dizzily into his arms, him catching me. "Donna, how many of those did you take?" He said looking at me furrowing his brow, as he grabbed my arms, and helped me stand steadily.  
  
"ERIC! God damnit, I took TWO." I rolled my eyes, as I sat down. "Migranes tend to make you a little...tipsy." I said, sighing. "I just don't feel good, okay?"  
  
He scanned me suspiciously. "Okay. Ok.." Eric walked towards the door, as he helped me get into bed safely, making sure I wouldn't fall or any of that shit.  
  
"I love you. Call me when you feel better."  
  
"Ok..Eric, I'm sorry I snapped like that."  
  
"Feel better..." He said, and with that he closed the door, softly.  
  
I grabbed my old stuffed animal that I'd had since I was a kid. I squeezed it, as I began to cry, my tears drenching it, hurting me...  
  
How I wished I could be myself again. Although, I liked how I was now. In an odd way, I liked feeling like this. Didn't I?  
  
  
  
I can remember  
  
The very first time I cried  
  
How I wiped my eyes  
  
And buried the pain inside  
  
All of my memories  
  
Good and bad that's passed  
  
Didn't even take the time to realize  
  
Staring at the cracks in the walls  
  
'Cause I'm waiting for it all to come to an end  
  
Still I curl up right under the bed  
  
'Cause it's takin' over my head  
  
All over again... 


	2. Chapter 2

oky, here's an update. sorry if this story's kinda out of character.. but review me plz! *3, CheLL*  
  
Disclaimer- don't own em..dont own the song.. yeh yeh  
  
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..::chapter 2::..  
  
I woke up, the sunlight stinging my eyes, as I squinted realizing I had dozed off. Morning already? I put my hand on my pillow to the side of me, flattening it down, as I looked at my digital clock, the bright numbers seemed to pop out at me, as it read 10:30 AM. I got out of bed, feeling dizzy still not caring as I reached over on my nightstand, and took another aspirin, shoving it in my mouth, and washing it down with the water from the day before. It was lukewarm by now, but once again---don't care.  
  
I walked over to the door, not feeling as dizzy for once, as I walked down the hall, and down the stairs. My dad was at the table eating breakfast.  
  
"Morning sunshine." He said, smiling, raising his coffee cup to his lips, and taking a quick drink. He smiled at me, "You ok?"  
  
"I'm fine." I said, smiling, as I walked to the refrigerator, and got out the orange juice, pouring a small bit into a glass cup. I took it over to the table, and sat on the opposite side of the table from where he was sitting. "Why?" I asked casually.  
  
"Well, you were just wearing that yesterday, and you slept all day..and night."  
  
I looked down at my clothes. Oh, I guess I did have this on yesterday...and I guess I did sleep all day and night. But when my stomach rattles like a pill bottle when I walk, I suppose you're not expected to be any better. (Well, not literally, but ya know.)  
  
"Yeah." I nodded. "I was sick."  
  
"Are you feeling better?"  
  
I nodded. "I suppose."  
  
He smiled at me, "That's good honey."  
  
He patted me on the back. I had been living a freaking lie to everyone I love. No one knows what I've been up to. No one knows this.  
  
I stood up, putting my cup in the sink, and walking out the door, calling as I go, "I'm going to Eric's." Shutting the door.  
  
*********  
  
"So yeah, he was like 'ok, you're going to the FARMHOUSE!!! The FARMHOUSE! Get it?" Eric started laughing like a mad man. Good God, here we go again. Kelso looked dazed, wondering what was going on..as always. Jackie was reading a magazine, laying all over Hyde. Hyde was acknoledging the TV blaring on, and Fez was..Fez.  
  
I sat next to Eric on the couch, half watching the TV, half...not. Half just spaced out.  
  
"Donna, is your migrane better?"  
  
I heard the mention of my name from Eric, and kind of come back into this world. "Huh? What mig--Oh, yeah..tons better." I nodded, smiling fakely.  
  
"That's good." He ran his fingers softly through my hair.  
  
I shook him off. He tried once again, and kissed me on the forehead. I backed away, not really wanting affection right now.  
  
"Donna...really what's wrong?"  
  
"DAMNIT.. You don't know when to stop, do you Eric? I....AM....FIIIIIIINE." I stood up, and ran up the stairs, pissed, but not knowing why. Do I love him? Or not? Is he great? Or is he an ass? Is he trying to be helpful? Or is he trying to screw it up? Is life good to me? Or is it bad? Has this world turned against me? Or not?  
  
  
  
Do you even know who you are?  
  
I guess I'm trying to find  
  
A borrowed dream or a superstar?  
  
I want to be a star  
  
Is life good to you, or is it bad?  
  
I can't tell anymore  
  
Do you even know what you have? 


	3. Chapter 3

HEEEY...--okay so ive had this written like a fuckload long time, i just haven't posted it coz no one's reviewed..but now someone did so BLESS YOU!!!! no seriously,(Candy.7) you *points*made me all happyness lol..i have like all of this story done, so if i get more reviews ill post it..ok later..#  
  
disclaimer-don't own em..except that rob dude...so i guess i own him!  
  
:::...chapter 3...:::  
  
"Yo Pincicotti!!" I heard him yell, motioning his hand for me to come over there. I looked around first, acting like I didn't know who he was talking to, just in case I saw someone I knew. When I figured the coast was clear, I headed over there.  
  
"Rob, just hurry up and give me the shit, and I'll go." I figited, shifting my weight from one foot to the other, my hands in my pockets looking around as if I didn't understand what was going on.  
  
"Whoa, Donna chill out." He put his hands on my shoulders looking at me in the eyes, his eyes just as bloodshot as mine, I could tell he'd been taken a fair share of his own drugs, also.  
  
I've seen him around at school a couple times, back in Junior High. He was always the 'bad ass' guy. The one that'd get suspended from school for smoking at the dance, you know the type. He reminded me much of Hyde, except more bad. He had black hair, that had a few streaks of blonde here and there, much as if he'd tried to bleach it, but it didn't go through all the way. He wore a white shirt, that stuck to his skin in a tight way, baggy jeans, and a black jacket. He wasn't bad looking at all. Not that I was attracted to him or anything. I suppose not.  
  
"You're right. I'm just kinda all...ya know...frazzled."  
  
He nodded, understandingly, as he hugged me, slipping the ziploc bag with a few pills into the front pocket in my jacket. I smiled, gently looking at him.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
He kissed me on the cheek, in a playful manner. "You're so cute." He chuckled randomly. I laughed, as I replied, "Thanks...I guess." He nodded his head upward in a half nod, not bringing it down, just nodding cooly.  
  
"I'll talk to you later...Hey, if you wanna go out sometime...You uh, have my number."  
  
I smiled. "Yeah...I'd like that." Oh yeah, Eric. The thought just raced through my head, not remembering him. Oh My God, how the hell could I forget him? "Oh..Yeah, uh I have a boyfriend..."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Eric Forman."  
  
"Ohh.." He laughed. "Yeah, I know him. Well, I've heard of him...You know."  
  
"Yeah..He can be a pain in the ass...but I guess I love him." I laughed, as did he.  
  
"Well, if ya ever don't love him, you can always come see me." He giggled, as he stood up, and walked towards the door, as I followed him.  
  
"Sure will." I nodded as he leaned in closer to me. At that moment he kissed me, and it was more magical than any kiss Eric's ever gave me.  
  
"DONNA?!" I heard a familiar voice. Oh shit. It was Hyde.  
  
I backed away. "Go, Rob...Damn it!" I pushed him away from me, fakely acting angry, and he smiled, wiping his cheek off with the back of his hand. He laughed as he walked away and headed down the street, the wind making his hair move gently. On the inside I was smiling, but on the outside...I wasn't. How the hell was I ever going to explain this to Hyde?  
  
"What the hell, Donna?" He looked at me, turning me around so I was facing him.  
  
I figured if I was going to tell someone about the little--drug problem--it'd be Hyde I'd want to talk to. So I took his hand, and led him in The Pub, as we sat in a two-seat table in the corner of the room.  
  
I explained it all, and Hyde understood me better than I thought Eric ever would.  
  
"Donna...You hafta stop this shit." He said after I told him the whole story, nearly after an hour passed.  
  
"I know. I know I do, and I've tried." I lied, not meeting his eyes, as I played with my straw in my drink.  
  
"No you haven't." He laughed, knowing I was lying.  
  
"Okay...OKAY but ya know." I rolled my eyes.  
  
"Yeah, I do...But Donna you need to stop before you hurt yourself."  
  
"I HAVE hurt myself. This whole time I've been hurting myself, wanting to."  
  
"Well, now you have...you should stop." He looked at me, seriously, as I understood how much of a good friend he was, and always has been, although I seemed to just now figure it out.  
  
I hesitated for a moment, as I took a deep, long sigh. "Thanks." I said, not wanting to lose my temper as I do with Eric so often anymore.  
  
He put his hand on my shoulder. "Donna..this is good." He laughed, as he continued.  
  
"And why's that?" I giggled, looking at him strangely.  
  
"You've got issues now..." He smiled. "Welcome to my world." He rolled his eyes, opening his arms to the sides, as we both stood up. I playfully punched him in the shoulder, as we both walked out. 


End file.
